"AW-RIGHT, KIDDIES! It's Pearl Harbor all over again. An attack when they like least expect it. Hell's Angels will be registering you. Charlie's handing out pens, pads, and clipboards to all the Angels. Angels should position themselves at spots 50 yards apart on the three hills bordering the perimeter of the track. People should then in an orderly fashion make their way and line up before the nearest Angel for enlistment. Veterans, active servicemen, and ROTC students create a separate file to the right of each civilian line for immediate processing. You will be required to pledge allegiance to the People's Army of Altamont: The time is right for fighting in the streets, yeah. America to win must face defeat, yeah, before the great force I give my hands and feet: The People's Army of Woodstock. Woo! Awright!"Anyone who claims conscientious objector status will be freed on his own recognizance, but is asked to submit a formal statement to Angels for our records. Those who object to the pledge--and we know there are some pigs in sheeps clothing out there--are invited to depart peacefully with those under sixteen and the parents of small children. Any attempt to sabotage the swift and orderly enlistment process that must be done by dawn will be met by instant apprehension and questioning at the main medical tent, which is presently being annexed by PAW MPs.
"The National Guard should be coming up the highway by dawn. There is a lot of crack weapons training and marching to do before then to get to our camp.
"Today, upstate New York! Tomorrow we take the Tappan-Zee!
